the jotter book of my life.

about this blog

eestherr.blogspot was opened to jot down the bits and pieces of my life, to accomodate my mindless musings and the daily notes which I wish to remember.

Add on to my memories, will you?

tagboard

Your tagboard here, preferably a skinny one with a width of not more than 138px.

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credits

Design: doughnutcrazy
Icon: morphine_kissed
Do credit accordingly if you changed the icon.

douglas rocks. :]
yes, and i'm seeing him next week!

i'm being forced to blog about this since i left out his name on my thankyou list.
=x

off to meet sharon!
and happy birthday, shuying! (:\

p/s. birthday post is below the tag replies post! (:

TAG REPLIES:
jeslynn, tommy, shuying, eileen, kristie, estheryeo, felicia, gabriel, jiawen; thanks for all your well wishes! loveloves! (:
tommy; yes, my manager is quite good. i think i applied for a total of 6days leave & 5 1/2 days. =x and thanks for your wishes! (:
wenli; hello. linked! (:
yuanhao; haha. i also put in alot of efforts for school exams but everytime also fail so i guess, it was also of miracle and hard work that i scored such results. haha yupps you should have watched vantage point! it's really a thumbs up movie! (:
lixuanns; haha, thanks so much for your help in the camp! (: and i'm seeing you just next friday. smile more and cheer up!
felicia; haha! i know that you wanted to dsiao me. go organise gathering! (: and it's okay to get my age wrong cos i'm young! HAHAHA.
qy; (:
joelteng; haha, i'm glad you all enjoyed the camp! hope you do pick up skills along the way! (:
wilson; i really love the book to bits and i finished reading it! (;
kristie; i aint any monster okay, you small lil imp. HAHA! and you owed me chocolates! i dont care! =x
estheryeo; HEY! where got difference in height? -tiptoes- HAHA. we are both tall alrights. (;
nightmare; it will come before you enlist! haha. (:
bettina; yupps that's what i'm looking forward to too. we shall take alot alot of photos on friday! (: seeing you on friday, pretty!
zq; of course i didnt type out or you would die out of malu-ness lah! HAHA. they irritating leh, spelt my name wrongly. urghs.
gabriel; haha, nice & fresh idea yea? my cadets were so sweeeet la! (; yesyes, thanks so much for the wishes! -catches it from you- (:
jiamin: you are a big fat liar! i didnt drool at all! and i was wearing my black fbt alright. you are just making this up to make everyone laugh at me, meanie! LOL.

Labels: tags

my 19th birthday! (:

This post gonna be a little different. It will not be posted in chronological order since my big day should be placed at the top while the rest just continues in that order. Haha.

CAUTION: freaking long post.

25thMARCH :D

I AM NINE-TEEN, 19! :D
Still, I’m not old and I think I’m forever 18. =x
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MYSELF, HONGYI, YVONNE, GINYONG & MSLEE! ;D
It’s all our special days!

hongyi&me(:

surprises started coming in one by one

the moment i opened my eyes (or i'm being forced to. HAHA) when my dearest partner screamed happy birthday at me & appeared with lovely roses.

I WAS SHOCKED TO SEE HER!
And initially, I would really want to kill the person who woke me up 20min earlier than my usual timing and seeing me in my super awful sleeping looks.
But since she’s so super sweet that she appeared in my house before she chiong off to cps to teach, i shall love her more for that. [:

Off to work, took ½ day since there’s really a lot of stuff to be completed.
Chiong off to meet my dearest aunty for swensens icecream and had a great catching up session with her before rushing off to meet my darling & co. (:

These sweet ladies and celebrated my birthday at the fish&co at Wheelock.
Sorry to keep them waiting so long!
And the service there is seriously poor, and they screwed up quite a number of times too.
but nonetheless, what makes it good is the company I enjoyed there! (:

At 3pm, some big shot strolled in and my jaw dropped and was opened quite widely. NIC TAN THAT ASSY LIED TO ME FOR THE PAST FEW DAYS THAT HE COULDN’T COME AND BLAH BLAH. STILL MADE IT SOUND SUPER CONVINCING THAT MORNING THAT HE CANT TAKE LEAVE. ISNT HE SUCH AN ASS? -______-!! AND SHARON GANGED UP WITH HIM TO CHEAT ME OF MY FEELINGS. They are super evil. Boo. Though I really didn’t want to say that, still, that assy surprised me with the card that he lied about buying it.

the card is so sweet rights? (;

The super sweet card & box darling made for me. (;
everything of my cards, container and the shirt is so pinkish! HAHA.

And thanks so much for all the arrangements and plannings you had made for me! [:

Then came the super sweet birthday cheesecake that appeared all of a sudden from nowhere and it was really unexpected. Lovesloves! (:

Dinner with the family at the hilltop restaurant at tuas area. Fabulous dinner!

rushed off to meet the red crossers for a short while at je kbox!

Thanks Alvin & lixuan for the purply water bottle! (:

And the bottle that qx and me got for hongyi is exactly the same one, just that it’s bigger! Haha!

Went off to cck for vantage point again! haha. Cabbed home after that. (:
Day ended at 11.25pm when I boarded the cab. (:

Fabulous day, aint it? Oh well, at least to me, it was.
cos I met up with a lot of my loved ones! :D

thanks for all the lovely cards, presents and well wishes! to all who made an effort, be it to plan, to remember, to make me feel like a queen on this big day or even to "lie" to me for the many smiles in return on my faces, thanks a million! loves! (:

here’s the people who love me:

qingxiang, jiamin, sharon, nicholas, yvonne(sf), ashley, eugene, yankai, jerome, qizhen, jerome, huihui, zhiqian, shiyuan, cherminn, nada, sumei, mardiana, kristie, huiling, jesslyn, jasmine, shujian, jodie, denisechew, hweeying, jeanette, shuying, jiawen, yixuan, elaine, jasonlim, fulin, jason sir, jianfu sir, baoyu, alvin, mary, lixuan, bettina, minyen, alice, hongyi, ms lee, fiona maam, wanjun, yongjun, adeline, denise ng, qiuyu, yvonne teo, eileen, peiwen, adrian, jackie, conglin, hoesan, peishi, melvin, weijian, jinhua, ziyi, kaiming, peihwa, yanping, yuanhao, yuyan, lydia, vera, sherlyn, jessica, ginyong, felicia, daniela, tommy, esther yeo, jing ni, daniel, connie, jingni, emily, ferynn, wilson, daph, yishen, polly, yaxin, sharlene, farhana(jj), xianghong, gabriel, jinming, audrey!
:D

Thanks love. (:

**

21st March:]

My first present of the year & the celebration for the special day came on good friday.

Haven’t opened it and like I said,

I will open it next year when I turn 20, just in case... yes, you know what. haha.

And you surprised me with the present.

thanks so much for making the effort to go down earlier just to get the present. [:

Yes, and sims that ass and I went back to the place that we went last year

a few days before my birthday too. northpoint!

And this year, it was at delifrance where we had those super awful food.

Definitely not going back there again for those awful food. Yucks.
And I want my dinner at tuckshop. :x

Caught the movie vantage point and this is one great movie

that is strongly encouraged to be watched!

5stars for this movie!

It captured my attention fully for the entire 86 minutes

and I seriously don’t mind watching it again.

the company for the movie was good too. (:

Went to causeway point cos for we thought that there was a coffee bean there

for us to slack around, drink coffee and chat.

ended up at yakun toast cos coffee bean doesn’t exist at causeway point

and fancy studying in that region for 3years and this kind of mistake can be made. -__-!!

**

22nd March(:

Met up with short one & Kenny for dinner at hougang.

Thanks so much for the book, ps I love you.

i really love the book to bits! (:

**

23rd March:]

Met up with yankai after tuition. a short catchup session though. Should have more to come!
Before nic came, went to shop around and a simple shirt dress caught my sight.
Tried it on and tada!

Had dinner at kobayashi at cine & that assy nic mistook my birthday to be on the 27th! AHHH! That’s so mean right. And he did a lot of mean things too. boo.

Walked to ps to catch the show rule #1 (not that I want to catch it but was being forced to by someone :x ) and I was so petrified by all the scary scenes please!

Kept using my shawl to cover my eyes
but some assy just kept pulling my shawl away and wanna make me feel more scared

despite the sending-chills-down-my-spine sound effect. -__-!!

**
24th March(:
Headed to hq for west district camp post mortem after work. due to the heavy rain,
I was all drenched and wet thoroughly. =/
Post mortem started late due to the heavy rain and it ended super late, at about 1030pm.

some really good advice and feedback were mentioned, will definitely take them into serious consideration and implementation the next time round.
Anyway, it was a great time working with the instructors and definitely a good learning experience for all of us. Thanks for all your contributions. (:

The trio (Elaine, Jason & Fulin) surprised me with two super sweet brownies cum cakes for my birthday alright! ;D

it’s so super sweet of them and the brownies tasted just as sweet! (:

thanks so much!

-hints tanyixuan- lol.

**
26th March(:

Took a day leave again and went nus to get my admission pin since I threw it away a few days before the results release for I thought there’s no point keeping it since my results wont be able to make it anywhere near to admit in nus.

Went down to see the unit for awhile before meeting my dearest partner up for dinner at mos burger. It’s such a great catching up session with her! And there’s more to come! (:

**
27th March
Work, OT and tuition.

**
28thMarch(:

Took half day leave again. =x
Went to meet zhiqian, Kristie, jasmine & shujian before heading to sp with them for speech day. they surprised me with the SUSHI CAKE they made that morning and that’s why they were late in meeting me! it's so sweet of them right? (:

Doesn’t it look yummy to you? so sweet of them to make them for me right? (:
and I ate 25 of them at one go. HAHA. =x
And and, zhiqian never ___ his ____. (fill in the blanks yourself =x) HAHAHA.

On to speech day.
Yes, it was quite screwed up and etc. and it’s super irritating that they spelt my name wrongly. It’s esther ker sHi man. With the “h” okays. Irritating. =s
And if you realized, I’m still giving it a serious thought. Will the next speech day come for us? Will we still be sitting together, crapping about? We shall see.

Met up with denise & qiuyu at bugis for arcade, dinner & shopping! (:
More meetups to come please. “Dots you”. =x

Happy 21st birthday kokseng! (:

**

To end off, here’s the happy me! (:

with much loves,

esther. [:

Labels: 19th birthday, celebrations, love, movies, surprises

Sorry for not updating.
Ohwell, I wasn’t lazy, I was really tired every single day and recently,

I have been feeling quite unwell.

This gonna be a very long entry so make sure you have the stamina before you start reading.

Are you ready?
Ready, get set, GO! (:

**
8thmarch-11stmarch

It’s a camp that we’ve all been waiting for. The 4days had been enriching, be it to the cadets or the instructors. I’m sure everyone did pick up some skills along the way for it was the 1st project ncos 06 and the 2nd project ncos 07 that allowed me to learn so much from it and progress to where I am now. I am not good, but at least I’m equipped with some skills, so yupps, thank you sir for everything. (:

The cadets have definitely improved tremendously from the day1 really-bad attitude to the day4 positive & totally fabulous attitude. See the difference that have been influenced their mindset to change? It’s the hard work of the instructors and also their determination to change for the better.

Day2 night of the camp, an accident happened. But it’s not anyone’s fault. nobody wanted such things to happen too so let’s not put any blame on anyone. What matters most is I’m fine, isn’t it? (: thank you all my fellow instructors, friends, seniors, cadets and teachers’ for your concern. Don’t worry, esther is still the lively one, always jumping around. (:

This camp has bonded a lot of us, from fellow Vis to good friends outside redcross. Special thanks to the loyalty ones: qx sir, the one who started proj ncos 2years back, alvin, lixuan, hongyi & loretta. (: thanks to jason too for assisting me in so much so much admin things.

And I wholeheartedly agree with lixuan’s statement:

“Although we may not be the finest salt you can find in the bag,

we offered our finest in building the greatest."

(sorry lixuanns I borrowed your line cos it’s really too meaningful =x)

To all the cadets and instructors, thanks for spending your 4days with us in this camp. Hope that it has been fruitful for you. (:

NCOs, One voice one mind, ha! (:

**
12ndmarch-

Went for dental appointment and they changed the wire and tightened it.

I changed my brackets to pink.

Got no idea why I chose that but yupps, it’s changed to pink.

Anyway, my teeth hurts. =/

Caught the OG sales with sharon & we got ourselves real good deals.

Bought myself a brown jane shilton wallet for 60bucks when the initial price is 80bucks.

Had a good catching up session with her as usual. (:

**
13rdmarch-

Finally went back to work & my nice manager treated us to breakfast. (:
Met up with my dear ones: Jerome & sharon! yayys.

Dinner at xin wang hongkong café at cine, the place that the last time I went, they forgot all about my order and made me nearly late for movies and caused my stomach to growl throughout the whole of the movie, enchanted.

Drinks after that at balcony. The ambience there is so fabulous.

What’s most important is the company I had with my two good friends.

loves!

On a sidenote, Happy birthday shufang jie! (:

**
14thmarch-

Took half day leave and out we go to party world and yishun safra. (:

definitely had a great time with them. those girls bullied me during the taxi trip to yishun. lol =x

hope that the sentosa trip comes soon! (:

After dinner at northpoint, felt really sick again and thanks qx & hongyi for sending me back home. sorry for the trouble! and qx, get well soon alright.

Happy birthday alan! (:

**
15thmarch-

Went to the doctor’s before going to nus open house with Eileen & sharon. the courses talk was really quite useful as it made me realized the courses that I wanna take. But it’s kind of a headache now that the uni vacancies are only so limited and there’s so many people who wanna get into uni. One worry down, and another popped out from nowhere. =/

Went to mos burger at tiong bahru for dinner with sharon being heading to bishan to meet up with my family. Catching up sessions with sharon is always that fabulous and great. and that plan that is thought of by the smart aries ladies will work out hopefully. HAHA! Thanks for the idea, anyway. (:

Happy birthday short one! though you aren’t around now, I still hope my wishes will be sent to you through telepathy! (:

**
16thmarch-

Had my 3hour tuition with my kid, followed by a trip down to Queensway

shopping centre to get my cousin the goggle he wanted.

Just praise me that I’m a super nice cousin who would go all the way down to

get him the things he want. (:

**
On a sidenote, here’s a few things I wanna mention.
Firstly, thanks to all for keeping my tagboard so lively even though my blog’s so dead! (:
Secondly, to my sf, dont worry about me. i'm perfectly fine. (:

Thirdly, please start texting to this number, 90065359 if you wanna book me. HAHA.

loves,

esther.

Labels: meetups, redcross, sick

i seriously dont know where to start replying from. =x anyway, i will start from the results release. thanks to all for your tags before that and all the well wishes. i read them all before. (:
TAG REPLIES:
wilson, gabriel, rouisanna, tommy, xinyi; thanks guys! (: yea i'm glad that i got such grades too. (:
zhiqian, adrian & jeslynn; HAHAHA you arent the only ones cheated by me. (:
hwa, lixuan & peiwen; relinked (:
bettina; HAHA! too bad i didnt give you any blue-blacks. =x anyway, thanks for all your help in the camp and staying by me esp on day2! (: loves.
yuanhao; thanks dude! you scored really really well too! yesyes, i do hope i will have more confidence in myself next time. but it's really a miracle that i scored such results. haha
daphne; HAHA, yes, for once i finally like my chinese name. see you around soon yea!
dC; i know you are so happy for me, my dear. (: hope you are feeling alright after your aust trip. we got to meet up with nan ren soon!
hanthi, jieying; hello! of course i remember you all. hope that you all enjoyed the camp and linked. (:
jingjing; wah how you came here? haha. try to send again? thanks! (:
jiawen; LOL. i never bully you yea? when did i snatch seats from you? -acts blur- HAHA. and stop reminding me that i'm turning old. lol =x
shuying; LOL. i wasnt emo-ing, neither was i sleeping. i was singing along and having my own mini concert too! HAHA. and i didnt bully june okay. is she bully me. LOL! and i'm super young please. cadets say i'm 17/18. HAHA!
zq; HAHA! yupps it's still quite active. i've updated! (: and i'm still very young!
bek; thanks for all you have done for this camp too! you must have been tired waking up so early every single day of the camp. and must update me just as you have promised k? HAHA. you know what i mean. (:
kristie; you this meanie little girl. kept reminding me that i'm turning old. lol
wilson; shortone! miss you too! quickly come back and we shall have dinner at kobayashi! (:

Labels: tags

actually was really too tired to blog but just in case i may worry some of you,
thanks for all your well wishes. && i did well in my As.

it was 1000x better than how i expected it to be. ;D
A-history
B-economics
D-geography

-JUMPS & SCREAMS-
(:

when i walk out of the hall and i turned over the results slip, i stunned for 10secs, curses teacher for giving me wrong result slip for the "A" & "B" caught my eye, then again saw my full name, jumps & tears-
and for once, i'm proud of my full name: ESTHER KER SHI MAN. (:

thanks to all who have been supporting me all this while: family, classmates, 4cians, redcross friends, and all my dear friends! (:

& i created a miracle. (:

here's the lovely ones at dinner at fish&co before heading to siam reap at holland v for some beer & liquor. just love their company so so much!

okay, gonna tug in my bed.
camp's starting super early tmr.
& i'm feeling sick already even before i attend the camp. =/

things just arent fine.

Labels: disappointment, miracle, results

you will when you believe?

results are going to be out in another 14hours time!
pray hard for me that i gonna do well. i need to, or i'm screwed. =/

yes, i freaked out. it was such an awful feeling. breaking down every single day just isnt normal, aint it. but thanks to the sweet lovely ones who msg-ed me/sent me their well wishes. it just came at the right time.

anyway, please do not ask me anything regarding my results unless i tell you myself. thanks for being so understanding!

sidetrack a little, do cherish the people around you, for you dont know when's the last time you maybe seeing this person, talking to him/her or feeling their presence for the last time.

all the best to myself & all my friends out there.
let it be a happy day for me.
please please please.
let me get through it smoothly.

i feel lost, for no one's there tomorrow.

Labels: results, stressed

In short, unless I have anything to elaborate, here it goes:

16th- NFC
17th- tuition & zouk flea with Eileen
18th- first day of work & west district camp meeting
19th-work, LS meeting
20th- work, meetup with sharon & hui
21st- work, TF meeting
22nd- work, family dinner
23rd- flea market with denise, 4C dinner, supper with Douglas, airport
24th- tuition, home
25th- half day leave, qx’s place, dinner with wufeng
26th- RCYECCSD meeting
27th- movie “ps I love you” with Eileen
28th- tuition
29th- half day, west district camp contact session
1st- movie “two faces of my girlfriend” with yixuan & the girls
2nd- tuition & family dinner
3rd- dinner with qiuyu
4th- which is now! (:

**

work at molex is fun & enriching. Cos I’m in the finance department, pick up quite a number of microsoft excel skills, costing stuff and etc. definitely a good learning experience for me and what’s more, the people there treats me really well. (:

there’s like not a lot of free time during work to slack around cos life in the finance department is really really busy! But luckily, the environment there isn’t stressful. (:

**
23rd-

It’s a day that I’ve been waiting for! 4C GATHERING! :D
It was definitely a successful gathering!

25/44 people turned out. Mind you, it’s been 2years since we’ve graduated. Some of the classes that just graduated from sec school a year ago or just recently may not even have this figure. I’m just proud of my classmates. (:

Dinner at fish market, ps. Seeing the long tables of people catching up just gives a warm feeling. It was just like yesterday that we graduated from school. It was just like yesterday when we were all sleeping in ek’s lessons. It was just like yesterday when we all signed the petition for we didn’t want sissy chong to be our maths teacher. It was all just like yesterday. Caught up quite a lot with jinhua too! and he scared me out quite a lot with the As thing. =/ anyway, there’s this rumour of my idol spreading around but still, I strongly believe that my idol is innocent. (:

Thanks yaxin & jiamin for organizing this gathering! (:

Didn’t join them on the walk to paradiz centre for i met up with Douglas before heading to the airport to send cousin off. Anyway, it’s a nice meetup with d of course! And thanks for the ride to my cousin’s place. (:
I’ll miss my cousin’s voice for the next three months. =/

**

What ties us all together is this word, Fuhua. Be it with yixuan, Adrian, or even my buddy, this journey ended early. Though we did said before that we will be the pillars of support for each other when we each lead our individual units, I’m sorry that I got to take a step earlier. I rather I abandon you than to let you abandon me like what you have been doing since last year. Actually the journey didn’t end that early also, oh well, I mean I spent 6years plus in Fuhua. 1/3 of my life!

**

Results will be released on Friday, 7th March, 230pm.
The next few days gonna be torturous. I’m still not mentally prepared for the worst and that may be the main reason so as to why I’m breaking down every few moments or getting into a state of shock whenever people mention about the release of the results. This is getting freaky, getting really eeky. =/

You know, I’m still the same old me, the esther who will panick when exams are here, will worry about results when it’s announced to be released in a few days. I’m still the same old esther who will breakdown at the thought of the scary results. zzz

I felt as though I lost myself in the search of the my goals in life. I used to have goals in mind and what to do and etc. but all of a sudden, I cant seem to find all these ever since I got the news that it’s going to be out on Friday.

Like what gurumak had said, in life, things do not go on as planned and even if it’s planned, it may not turn out that way for this is life. . The nicest thing on earth that can happen is when nothing is expected and it happened. (not her exact words but somewhat similar)

Please do pray well that I will pass my As with good scores. Pray hard for me.

p/s. i will give it a thought. (:

Labels: fuhua, redcross, results, work